Happy Birthday Christian

You want to know what's nerve wracking? It's putting your baby that you still think of as an adorable 3 year old behind the wheel. I can't believe he's already 16. ARRRGH! Christian is so special to me. He's always been so charismatic and talented, and he makes me laugh every day. On top of all of that, Christian is one of the most intuitive people I know. He is smart and observant, and can spot someone's true intentions almost a mile away. That's not to say that he doesn't often wear teenage blinders, but Christian's always been an old soul in a young body.

I tend to be very protective of Christian, because he's tried to leave this world 3 times. Once, when he was a baby, he almost died of hypovolemic shock because his doctor would not properly diagnose him with Pyloric Stenosis. By the time he had surgery, it was almost too late. Next, when he was 3 months old, Christian had an anaphylactic reaction to sulfa and we got to the hospital just in time. At 11 years old he had another anaphylactic reaction in his sleep to an unknown trigger. If he had not shaken the bunk bed and wakened his brother, we might not have known he was suffocating, and he would have died. Along with his allergies, Christian also suffers from asthma so I'm constantly worrying that he will have an asthma exacerbation when I'm not with him. Needless to say I have a very hard time letting Christian go.

Now though I have to be brave. I have to let him go out on his own. It is very scary, and it's even scarier to think of him driving Nicholas around. I don't like to think of both boys riding around in the car together. Heck, I still have a hard time when Alyssa travels with Logan, or when she's home and takes both boys somewhere. I can't sleep until they're all three home. I guess being a mom never gets easier.

Pray for me to have strength and peace, and pray that Christian will have common sense and safe driving habits. Also pray that all of the dumba$& idiot drivers stay away from my babies. I love you Christian.